The Days That Were Never Mine - The Cost of Being Whole - part 10
Aarav didn’t speak for a long time.
Not to the voice.
Not to himself.
Because the truth had settled in.
This wasn’t about fighting anymore.
It was about choosing.
And for the first time—
He knew what he wanted.
“I’m going to end this,” Aarav said quietly.
Silence followed.
Not resistance.
Not surprise.
Just… listening.
“I don’t want to share my life anymore,” he continued.
“I don’t want to forget parts of it. I don’t want to depend on something I don’t understand.”
A pause.
Then—
“You understand me.”
Aarav shook his head.
“No,” he said firmly.
“I understand what you did. Not what you’ve become.”
The room felt still.
“And what have I become?”
Aarav hesitated.
Then said it.
“Something that decides for me.”
Silence.
He stood up slowly.
Walked toward the table.
Picked up the notebook.
The words still there.
“IF I FORGET AGAIN… HE WILL STAY.”
Aarav stared at it.
“I’m not that child anymore,” he whispered.
And with one sharp motion—
He tore the page out.
The sound echoed louder than it should have.
For a moment—
Nothing happened.
Relief flickered.
Then—
The world shifted.
Not like before.
Not subtle.
Violent.
Aarav staggered back.
The room tilted slightly.
“What—”
His vision blurred.
The edges of objects softened.
Lost clarity.
The clock.
The table.
The walls.
Everything felt… distant.
“No…” Aarav whispered.
A sharp pain hit his head.
Not pressure.
Not heaviness.
Absence.
Like something was being pulled out.
“Stop…” he gasped.
“You wanted this.”
The voice was weaker now.
Fading.
Aarav dropped to his knees.
“No… this isn’t right…”
Memories flickered.
His childhood.
School.
Faces.
Voices.
But they didn’t stay.
They slipped.
One by one.
“No… no, don’t take that…” Aarav pleaded.
“I’m not taking anything.”
The voice struggled now.
Breaking.
“I’m what holds them together.”
Aarav froze.
“What…?”
Another memory vanished.
A name.
A place.
Gone.
Panic surged.
“No! Stop this!” he shouted.
“You’re the one letting me go.”
The truth hit harder than the pain.
Aarav’s hands trembled.
“You’re lying…”
But deep down—
He knew.
All those missing years.
All those incomplete memories.
He hadn’t remembered them—
Because this presence had been holding them for him.
“You weren’t just… escaping things…” Aarav whispered.
“No.”
A pause.
“I was carrying them.”
The room spun slightly.
Aarav clutched his head.
“Then why hide it from me…?” he asked weakly.
Silence.
Then—
“Because you couldn’t survive it.”
Another piece slipped.
Aarav gasped.
“What am I losing…?” he whispered.
“Everything you gave me.”
His chest tightened.
“And what did I give you…?”
A long pause.
Then—
“The parts of you that hurt too much to keep.”
Tears formed in Aarav’s eyes.
Pain.
Fear.
Loneliness.
All the things he had buried—
All the things he had handed over—
Were leaving with it.
“Wait…” Aarav said suddenly.
The voice weakened further.
“You chose this…”
“No,” Aarav said quickly, shaking his head.
“I chose to take control. Not to lose myself.”
Silence.
The world steadied… just slightly.
“What happens if you’re gone?” Aarav asked.
A faint answer came.
“You’ll be whole.”
A pause.
Then—
“Or empty.”
The words lingered.
Aarav’s breathing slowed.
Whole…
Or empty.
Was there even a difference?
He looked at his hands.
Still his.
But they felt… unfamiliar.
“Can I take it back?” he whispered.
Silence.
Longer this time.
Then—
“You can’t undo me.”
Aarav’s chest tightened.
“Then what do I do?”
The answer came slowly.
Fading.
“Choose… how we exist.”
Aarav closed his eyes.
This wasn’t about removing it.
It never was.
It was about understanding it.
Accepting it.
Or losing everything tied to it.
Aarav opened his eyes again.
“I don’t want to erase you,” he said quietly.
The room stilled.
“I want to understand you.”
Silence.
Then—
A faint shift.
Not outside.
Inside.
Like something… waiting.
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